Thursday, December 23, 2010

Little baby girl.

One thing is for sure: this baby girl is in TROUBLE!!!!! Not even born yet and she has caused so much trouble already, she's going to be grounded until she's 50.
Many of you might know what's going on, (many of you might not but not be interested anyway) but since this blog is also a way to keep record for our family, here it is anyway.
Ok, on my first ultrasound, I had the 25th of May as my due date, making me today 18 weeks and 3 days, and my ultrasound yesterday showed that I was 19 weeks. The Doctor said we'll still go with the 25th, so Jennie, the calendar still has it right :)
On Tuesday the 30th of November I started spotting a little bit, but after talking to the nurse, she told me not to worry that it was normal. On Friday of that same week, however, I woke up to have a heavier bleeding, so we called the doctor and they ordered me an ultrasound, in which showed that I have a tear between the wall of the uterus and the sac. The good news is that the tear was away from the placenta, the bad news is that the tear could get bigger, so they told me to take it very easy, lay down as much as possible, which means that I have to lay down most of the day, if I have to get up and do something light, then do it, but then go back to bed. I did, I came back and I spent the rest of the day on the couch, but still that night when I woke up at 3am to use the bathroom, I was soaked in blood and the bed and just imagine a lot of blood so I don't have to keep describing. Dane took me to the E.R. right away and after several exams, and since they were unable to compare the results from both ultrasounds, it was determined that baby and I were Ok, so I was sent home with a double order to take it easy, which I've been trying, but this 3 little girls make it very hard. Then on Sunday night I woke up again in the middle of the night bleeding again, and this time also with a horrible pain, which ended up being contractions, and then the doctor was not concerned just for the tear getting bigger, but also for me going on labor, because that early in pregnancy, there is nothing it could be done. Sooooo, days have passed, and I have had some bleeding on and off, and pain on and off as well, and severe pain and bleeding if I try to even do any moderate effort. Yesterday I had another ultrasound in which we received some good news and some bad news. Good news, baby is alive and ok. Bad news, I'm not just not healing, the tear is still there, I have hematoma all over the place and the placenta is also bleeding and starting to detach. So, as little as I feel like I've been doing, apparently I'm still doing too much. It's tough to balance, especially with the girls. And to be honest, the emotional part is just as hard as the physical, e.g. Today Dane was working, and my mom had to go out, so I left the girls downstairs watching a movie while I lay down, because I started having one of those episodes of severe pain, but when the worst part of the pain was over I got up again, and I heard Giada yelling "Mom, arriba!!" (That’s what she says when she wants to be picked up) and my heart was shattered in tiny little pieces knowing that I couldn't go get her and that I was alone to ask for help. So she had to sit on the swing for 4 long hours until my mom came back, that whole time feeling desperate to just be able to have her in my arms. I miss my little Giada so much and I know it's been tough on her as well, because at least I know why I'm doing it, but as much as I explain it to her, I know she doesn't understand why I don't hold her anymore as I used to. So on top of everything, I'm also an emotional wreck, so please forgive me.
Anyway, so this is what's happening with this little baby and all the mess she's causing without even knowing. But she's more than worth it, my sweet little angel.